2nd Entry After 3 years

It has been 3 months since I've met you. And it that 3 months, my feelings for you evolved from simple attraction to being so in love.

It was complicated at first, I was not so sure of what exactly I am to you. I fell in love with you that fast even though we were both committed.

But things has its way of working things out. Soon we found ourselves leaving our partners (now exes). Then we became together, it was too soon, yet we became official.

It is just our first month, yet you already introduced me to your family, and they are okay with it.

I know I should feel secure with you, though it is just our first month. You always gave me re-assurance that you love me, yet I still feel insecure of things.

I know I should trust you, and let go of these insecurities. And I promise you I will.

I promise that thing will work out alright.

Faith, Trust, and Hope

1.) Once, all villagers decided to pray for the rain. On the day of prayer, all people gathered and only one boy came with umbrella... that's faith.

2.) When you throw a baby in the air, the baby laughs because he know you will catch him... that's trust.

3.) Every night we go to bed, we have no assurance that we will wake up the next morning, but still we have plans for tomorrow... that's hope.

Should I pursue him or not?

Crossing my fingers. I hope this person has something better in mind for me. Even if I know that crossing my fingers won't really make any difference at all. Hahaha!

I actually have a crush on this guy (he was actually my trainer), and this is exactly his post at Facebook.

Although he knows that I have a crush on him, I don't think that there would be a possibility that we can be together since I'm not his type. However some of my colleagues told me that there's nothing wrong in trying to woo the guy. But I don't really know.

Then I just saw this post. I pretty much sure that that post wasn't meant for me (although at some point I'm hoping that it really is), but I can't really help it. I wanted to text him now, just to know how he is but I'm just so afraid that it would be just a nonsense text to him. I'm just so afraid that he might reject me.

Should I pursue him, or should I just keep it to myself?

I don't know.

Peace Be With You

Last night, I attended a mass at my favorite church.

A boy beside me turn to his mother and said "love you mom". I was a bit distracted by his gesture. Think, reminisce, ask myself... have I said this words to my mother? my father?

They were always there for me, esp. my mom. Of all the things they have done for me why is it that I find it hard to tell them this words? why is it that I have the courage to tell them I'm a homosexual but don't have the courage to tell them I love them?

I know it really sounds weird but, I really don't know why... somehow I hope that someday, before my book end I've already said it to them...